Patience

I have got to be more patient today but that is so hard when you have only gotten a few hours of sleep.

Dustin is sicker than yesterday, you can see the stuffiness in his face. His cheeks are bright red and he is leaving a trail of germs around him that resembles a snail trail. Harlan now has it but seems to be doing better which is probably due to the antibodies in the breast milk he has been demanding for the last 24 hours. He woke up last night after spiking a fever and tossed and turned for hours, since he would only sleep in our bed it kept me up.

Oh, my patience is so worn thin by that. My husband had to go into San Francisco, 5 hours alone for the drive so I am going to be solo all day. Normally my nursing tea would keep me sane (some of the herbs in it reduce anxiety) but they ran out of it at the store.

I will have a shot of trying to meditate a bit to get a handle on this if I can get both of them to sleep at the same time and I can get a nice hot bath. If is the question. Harlan is just about out but Dustin is insisting on laying on the floor, runny eyes and nose and singing while he sucks loudly on his fingers. I know I shouldn't be grossed out by that but it is like fingernails on the chalkboard with no sleep. Ugh.

If I can make it through today with only the tiniest amount of patience I have I will be very proud of myself, very proud indeed.